The first time breastfeeding in public feels far bigger than it logically should.
You’ve fed your baby countless times at home. Half asleep. On the sofa. Standing in the kitchen reheating coffee for the third time. But the minute you step into a café or sit on a park bench, it suddenly feels like you’re about to do something radical.
But you’re not, you’re simply feeding your baby.
If you’ve Googled “breastfeeding in public” at 2am wondering whether you’re allowed to, how to do it discreetly, or what happens if someone complains, you’re very normal.
So, let’s talk about it properly.
1. It Feels Bigger in Your Head Than It Is in Real Life
One of the hardest parts of breastfeeding in public for the first time is the anticipation. You imagine people staring. You picture awkward comments. You overthink where to sit. But in reality, most people really don’t notice.
They’re scrolling, eating, arguing about oat milk prices, chasing their own toddlers. You feel like the main character, but (and this is meant in the nicest possible way!) you aren’t.
That first public feed often feels exposing because you feel exposed. Postnatally your body is different and it’s natural to feel hyper-aware of yourself. But I promise, that feeling passes surprisingly quickly.
2. You Are Legally Allowed to Breastfeed in Public in the UK
This is the important one.
In England, Scotland and Wales, the Equality Act 2010 protects your right to breastfeed in public. It is illegal for someone to ask you to leave a public place, café, shop or public transport because you are breastfeeding.
You do not have to cover up. You do not have to move. You do not have to use a toilet. And frankly, would you eat your own lunch in one?
Knowing the law can take the edge off that first outing. You’re not “being brave.” You’re exercising a normal, protected right.
3. Start Somewhere That Feels Manageable
Your first time breastfeeding in public does not need to be the busiest brunch spot in town.
Choose somewhere low pressure. A park bench or a café you know well. Better still, a baby group where half the room is doing the same thing.
Confidence builds through repetition, not through forcing yourself into uncomfortable situations.
The first time feels huge but the fifth time barely registers.
4. Feed Before Your Baby Is Desperate
There’s a narrow window between “slightly hungry” and “screaming like I’ve never been fed in my life.”
Try to catch it early (this is a bit of practise makes perfect).
A calm baby draws far less attention than a distressed one, and you’ll feel more settled too. If you’re searching “how to breastfeed in public discreetly”, the truth is that calm feeds are naturally more discreet.
It’s not about hiding, it’s about making it easier on yourself.
5. Clothing Logistics Matter More Than Confidence
A lot of anxiety around breastfeeding in public isn’t about other people. It’s about fumbling.
If you’re wrestling with a tight sports bra, lifting your entire top over your chest, trying to hold a muslin in place with your chin while unclipping something with one hand… of course it feels stressful.
When access is straightforward, feeding becomes boring. Which is ideal.
This is why many breastfeeding mums prioritise practicality with things like easy clip-down bras and zip-and-feed tops and layers that allow access without undressing. Our own breastfeeding hoodies have won numerous awards for 'best breastfeeding accessory' as voted by mums who have tried and tested them while out and about themselves.
Confidence often comes from not having to think about your clothes.
6. Most People Genuinely Don’t Care
This deserves repeating. Most people genuinely do not care that you are breastfeeding in public.
If someone does notice, they usually look away quickly. The idea that public feeding automatically draws attention is far bigger than the reality.
And if someone does stare? That’s about them. Not you.
7. You Don’t Owe Anyone Discretion
There’s a lot of language around “discreet breastfeeding in public.”
You’re allowed to be discreet if that is what makes you feel more comfortable. But you’re not required to be invisible.
You don’t need a muslin tent. You don’t need to apologise. You don’t need to hide in a quiet corner.
You’re feeding a baby. That’s it.
8. If Someone Says Something (And this is rare)
It’s uncommon, but it does happen.
If someone suggests you move, you’re within your rights to stay put. A calm “I’m feeding my baby” is often enough.
Again, the Equality Act 2010 protects you. Businesses cannot ask you to leave because you’re breastfeeding.
The more informed you are, the steadier you’ll feel.
9. It Gets Easier - Quickly
The first time breastfeeding in public feels like a headline event.
The second time feels manageable. By the fifth time, you’re mid-conversation and barely breaking stride. It becomes just another part of leaving the house.
Remember when you learned to drive and wondered if you would ever change gear without thinking the moves through in your head? This is the same. You stop planning your entire day around where you might feed. You stop feeling like you need a strategy meeting beforehand.
It becomes normal and like second nature.
If you’re about to breastfeed in public for the first time, it’s okay to feel nervous. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. It just means you’re adjusting.
And like most things in early motherhood, the more you do it, the more ordinary it becomes.
